Category: personal history

Admiration for Inherited friendship

Admiration The theme this week for WordPress Photo Challenge is to show someone we admire and tell about them.

So here goes….

I can sometimes be overly protective of my friends. Occupational hazard? Oldest child syndrome? Personal grandiosity? Who knows but let me just say, it took me a while to get on board with my very best friend when he finally found his heart-head-soul mate!

I mean, I had watched him make some lousy girlfriend choices during our 39 year long best friendship including choosing ME, for about a minute, in the very beginning. (Thank god we both knew to nip that sucker in the bud. Oh man, the friendship, the partnership, the family times we could have missed out on….)

Anyway, a few years ago, he brings home this woman and even though right away, he thinks she’s “the one”, someone had to remain skeptical until she proved herself worthy! Right?

Poor woman. I wonder if she even noticed those piping hot coals we all raked her over. Probably not, because my best friend’s family (and me) all have way too much class to do that in any kind of noticeable way. As for Patty, describing her as having grace and class, well let’s just say I now know what “woefully inadequate” means.

But let me tell you, she’s all the way “in” now. I just love this woman. She is exactly who she says she is. She is fun and funny and generous and patient (especially with my friend). She is stunningly beautiful and exceptionally smart…maybe even smarter than my best friend, but do NOT tell him I said that. He has a fairly healthy ego, that one.

Turns out she and I grew up just blocks from each other in San Diego and while I sat at the beach, dreaming of becoming a people helper, a few years later, she was at the same beach, writing like crazy, rehearsing to become a famous writer.

Her list of achievements on the road to her youthful goal is long. She was a “professor of bilingual education, a school principal, and wrote teacher guides, educational texts and curricula.”

That last is an excerpt from the bio on her award winning NOVEL!!! Just one of her books! Check her out!!

http://www.patriciacleary.net/

http://www.patriciacleary.net/blog/

She has accomplished so much more and survived unbelievable challenges but those are her stories to tell, not mine.

She and my best friend, along with me and my James, have created a permanent friendship, a partnership really. We are building a home together, a retreat “compound”, for ourselves now and as a legacy for our children and their children.

This is the four of us after a hard day’s work building Casa Esmeralda.

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I’m so happy for my best friend, but even happier for myself.

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Look who I inherited!!!

And THIS is the same woman!! Fearless, determined, amazingly strong!

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Mutual Admiration Society 

 

 

Admiration for my Teacher/Mentor/Auntie

 

Admiration

Jean Illesley Clarke

This is Ms. Jean Illsley Clarke.

You can Google Jean and find a number of pictures and videos, and also, references to her books, etc. She’s a very accomplished woman in more than one field. (I’ll even list some at the end of this post.) If you are a parent, a teacher or an adult educator, and have not treated yourself to some Jean Clarke, you have a treat in store.

But none of that published stuff tells you what she is like as a woman, a friend, a beloved “family” member.

The first thing you need to know is that clearly, she lies about her age. As of just a week ago, she was claiming something ridiculous like 92! But this is how she still looks! Come on!

Jean has this amazing presence and presentation that invites Guru-type adoration and attention, which she disallows in such a down to earth way, you feel her equal.

She is an unparalleled teacher and workshop presenter, who can tame the most obnoxious, disruptive students or hecklers, without them ever even knowing it…no shame from Jean…ever.

And, as my Mentor of almost forty years, more like a beloved Aunt now, she has taught me more about myself than anyone. And believe me, I have done a lot of therapeutic soul-searching about myself! That’s partly an occupational necessity…I am a Psychotherapist. (that is ONE word, by the way.) When I think I’ve reached down as dark as it gets, Jean encourages me to dig even deeper. She has helped me hang on in some of the toughest moments of my life.

Imagine this: You tell her your most painful story ever, trusting like never before, and here’s her reaction. She locks her penetrating blue eyes with yours for a long time and gently places her hand on your cheek. Then she says “Oh…(insert your name here)…”.

That’s it. That’s all it takes to know you are seen and heard and are absolutely not alone.

Seriously though, Oprah missed this one. Maybe even Dr. Phil. Not that those two should carry nearly the weight they do in terms of public opinion, but more people on the planet should know about this absolutely amazing woman, and hear about what she advocates.

My deepest admiration is of her ability to, no, her insistence on learning from absolutely everything. She is the consummate student of life. And the ultimate translator of these lessons into language the rest of us can easily understand and USE!

This is my favorite picture with Jean. It was a lovely sunset cruise around Puget Sound for our Staff R and R, after a power-packed, five day Training with about forty students.

 

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Jean Illsley Clarke

Jean Illsley Clarke received a bachelor of science degree from the College of Education and Human Development (CEHD) at the University of Minnesota in 1948. She has been a pioneer and advocate for children and families in the state of Minnesota, across the nation, and internationally for more than three decades. She is widely recognized for her book Self-Esteem: A Family Affair that became the seminal work on how parents could raise children with healthy self-esteem.

From Amazon

Jean Illsley Clarke is an accomplished workshop leader and a nationally certified and internationally known parent educator. She is the author or co-author of several books about families including Self-Esteem: A Family Affair; Growing Up Again, Parenting Ourselves, Parenting Our Children; Time-In: When Time-Out Doesn’t Work; How Much is Enough? Everything You Need to Know to Steer Clear of Overindulgence and Raise Likeable, Responsible, and Respectful Children. Who, Me Lead A Group? is about leadership skills.

She has designed, tested, and taught accompanying courses and has offered facilitator training across America and in other countries. Her books have been translated into eight languages. The developmental affirmations have been translated into ten languages and used with groups as diverse as affluent Americans and disadvantaged South Africans. Recently she has been involved in the five research studies on overindulgence.

Overindulgence talks  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enw942U421Q

and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4VyMXbj1FE

Grandparenting  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ultbBYRQRVk

 

 

Admiration on chosenperspectives for WPC

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Undying admiration and gratitude for my long, LONG-time friend, Karuna. Our paths (in probably 30 years) have crossed, paralleled, drifted apart and re-linked more than a few times.

I won’t tell you my version of her whole biography. You can read that for yourself on

https://livinglearningandlettinggo.wordpress.com

But you won’t find a more courageous, adventurous, giving, dedicated, ethical and loving person, teacher, friend and mother.

Let me just say that what I am currently admiring most is her seemingly endless patience with me as my “Blog Coach” (and butt kicker)! Thanks Karuna for pushing (encouraging) me to do a WordPress Blog. I’m loving it and all the wonderful, talented, amazing people I am meeting.

PS Before you complain about the photo, Karuna, I think it captures so many of the things I listed above. You are truly a beautiful person!

Admiration

Abstract from Harley Road Trip

 

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From Bellevue, Washington to Pacific Grove, California (including camping in the Redwoods). This shot taken right after we were passed by the Hell’s Angels on the freeway next to Lake Shasta …hmm, reminds me of another great story.

Watch for “The Hell’s Angels meet the Mormons”!!

 

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Dinnertime (well, Breakfast) for WPC

I feed my local crows every morning….for 35 years. My neighbors think I am nuts, and compare it to feeding the local RATS!! In their defense, I suppose their diagnosis of me comes from the fact that I stand on my deck “cawing” at the top of my lungs every morning at 7 until my birds show up….and they do! If I am not out there on time, they let me know…loudly!

From my desk, I look right out onto the deck and am just a few feet from them so I take a ton of pictures…not fancy photographs, just “extended animal-family” snapshots.

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Crows are amazing birds, unbelievably smart. I keep a pan of water on the deck for them and if the day’s fare is too crunchy, or maybe too salty, these clever birds dip each bite into the water for softening or rinsing, before devouring.

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Sometimes there is competition for their daily meal and there is a minor scuffle.

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I had read about this one thing crows do that I always wanted to witness and finally, they complied. Like several other species I won’t mention, Teenage Crows act very entitled! They demand to still be fed, sometimes even after they have outgrown their parents.

I found this information on the Cornell bird site:

Most young birds leave their parents soon after leaving the nest, often being chased away, and never see the parents again. In contrast, American crows never chase away their offspring, and the young may remain at home for years….While they wait for a breeding opportunity, most crows help their parents raise young. They help feed the incubating female, feed the nestlings and fledglings, defend the territory and the nest, and stand guard over other family members while they forage. Such cooperative breeding behavior is rare in birds. Only a handful of species in North America exhibit it, and none are as widespread as the American crow.   http://www.birds.cornell.edu/crows/planta.htm

 

Check out this series of snapshots. Can you tell who is the Entitled Teenager?

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And FINALLY!!!!

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Now, I just want to see a fluffy black baby and my crow dreams will be complete.

Dinnertime

Dinnertime for WPC #5

Dinnertime

When we house-sit for my sister in the San Juan Islands, we have the best dinner times ever. They have a bamboo farm (Wild Bird Bamboo), the coolest house in the world and gardens that people travel great distances to see.

We usually come at the peak of the garden’s production time and of course, not wanting to waste any of it, they encourage us to EAT, EAT, EAT!!

So we do…just to please them, of course.

Enjoy a walk through paradise, and think about the dinners you could make!

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bridge over pond

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bench for meditating on small island in middle of pond

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Ola, the Wonder Dog, accompanying Gardeners

Once across the two arched bridges, you come to a glorious expanse of well-loved Garden!

a sweeping left to right view

And THEN, there’s also the Greenhouse!

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Go ahead…Pick and EAT!!!

(In the interest of full disclosure, we got the pecans and avocados at the market.)

HOORAY, DINNERTIME!

(Not shown; the huge blueberry bush enclosure, and the apple and peach trees!)

Don’t even get me started on the FLOWERS! Another post entirely!

 

The “Chosen” Future for WPC

Future

If these “impossible” connections can happen…..

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between predator and prey………..

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between newcomer and homey…..

JOY and Bandit

between natural enemies…..

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between famous and fan…..

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Then maybe in the FUTURE my sisters and I can reunite!!!

Landscape #3 for WPC

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The stunning beauty of the landscape in Mississippi, especially the southern most end of the historic Natchez Trace, is a surprise to most.

The town of Natchez is in a real double bind.

Tourists are drawn there for the natural beauty, the impeccably preserved antiquity, as well as gambling, right on the river, and are a mainstay for the town’s financial well-being. But the peace and solitude in places where the scenery leaves you speechless can be disturbed by floods of out-of-town visitors.

I only lived there for about three years, but it grows on you, grows in you, gets in your blood (and, if you’re not careful, will change your accent and vernacular!)

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Oh and Kudzu? It’s a real thing!!!

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