Impossible to be down today…
Meet our newest family member…long awaited (a couple of years)!
This puppy is very special, bred by Crooked Rooster Farms in Snohomish, WA. He is a Border Collie/Golden Retriever blend, bred for the Collie’s intelligence as well as the temperament of the Retriever. He is already exhibiting both those qualities.
And we think he will probably grow to be more Retriever size (he’s a little CHUNK!) than the Border Collie.
We are all so in love!!!!
Even Loki, the Maine Coon kitten, who has had the run of the upstairs house…until now. He can’t wait to be done with his silly cone so he can romp with the puppy!
To start with, one of my favorite musicians, Geoffrey Castle, an electric violinist, who plays everything from hard rock and roll to Irish Ballads, and whose biggest performance of the year is naturally Saint Patrick’s Day, has suggested that tonight, from the safety of our own living rooms, at 7 PM (PST), everyone sing along with The Wild Rover
Like so many other professions, the need to address current health crisis on our planet has basically eliminated Geoffrey’s income for now. So listen to his stuff and buy something should you feel inspired to…
Next, I have received so many wonderful emails this week from my clients sharing how they are taking care of themselves while in “Self Quarantine”!! Maybe one will inspire you!!
One couple has banded together with another couple, their best friends, to support each other, and not be alone. Living, working and sharing meals at home.
Another couple writes: “We are both working from home and I just feel a new sense of connection and love between us 🙂 What a time to get that when we get to be stuck together with this new working from home lifestyle!”
Trapped in a New York apartment and working from home, this person says “I’m organizing my apartment, taking long baths, and online shopping.” (This could be dangerous for me personally…Hmm, do I really need 5 of those gaiter neck warmers??)
I LOVE this, a couple who has been struggling so hard to find enough time to keep their relationship healthy says, “We’re hunkered down in our house and oddly this time has actually been good for us even though life is very strange right now. I think cutting out the commute, social planning and resetting has meant slightly less stress and more time for those small moments of joy.”
And in a hard irony, from a newly retired person, is uplifting anyway! “What a time for having to avoid contact with people now that I am (finally) trying to expand my social connections, not limit them. Oh well. I have survived pet rocks, disco, gas shortages, big hair bands, grunge and having a reality tv president, so I have hope and faith that I will manage to get through this okay. :-)”
I’ve been finding some very uplifting things and great advice online. One of my favorite “teachers” is Joan Borysenko. She shared this wonderful video a few days ago. About 8 minutes,to help you ground and relax.
Joan wrote today: Even amidst this crisis, and all the preparation it entails, we have the ability, perhaps the obligation, to spend a little time looking for the beauty, the goodness and the grace in life. Focusing on the good calms our mind, strengthens our immunity, and it feels wonderful!
And lastly, for all the young people still experiencing the blissful belief in immortality, us older folks need you to slow your party roll for just a while, so you don’t expose us to this virus. Just remember:
Your Grandparents were called to war.
You’re being called to sit on your couch.
You can do this!!
So hunker down. DO all the nice things for yourself you rarely have time for. We’ll all wait it out together.
In the mean time…can you CROCHET????
“To remain indifferent to the challenges we face is indefensible. If the goal is noble, whether or not it is realized within our lifetime is largely irrelevant. What we must do therefore is to strive and persevere and never give up.”
― Dalai Lama XIV
Fair warning (as I have stated before about my blog…I share happy stories AND painful stories), as of this writing, this post has no happy ending.
Clock the Time
Perfect for me this week. And I hate it!!
I’m in the middle of the longest, most frightening period of time I have experienced in my 71 years of life. In reality, it’s only been about 7 days so far, but for most of the last week, time has “stood still”, you know, the way it can sometimes when it loses all meaning! But in the moments when relevance has slipped back in…hmm, it’s been 13 hours since I’ve eaten anything…the time passing has seemed like an eternity.
I’m having one hell of a time Choosing My Perspective!
It’s been a little like attending a childbirth…where the only important clocking of time is tracking the number of minutes between contractions, or the more important clocking the time issue, the number of hours of labor so far. I’ve attended so many births and in the latter example, I would be vaguely aware of crossing that somewhat subjective line, mostly determined by the Doc or Midwife. It happens when a labor goes from what will later make a good story-I was in labor for 16 and 1/2 hours to the…Uh-oh, this is taking way too long moment. I know that look, that Uh-Oh facial expression on the face of the person there to “catch” that baby…
All the waiting this week has also triggered some deep, internal philosophical debates about the passing of time and the theory about feelings/emotions I have always taught my clients.
My basic premise has always been what I learned early in my training and education as a Psychotherapist.
-Emotions are basically biological…a physiological response to some perceived trigger, real or not.
-Feelings are not right or wrong. They just ARE!
-We can’t control a feeling response…only what we do with it…what we conclude from it and how we express it.
-Ignoring feelings completely is not good for us. They are going to need expression eventually…and the longer we wait, the more messy, and out of proportion they can become.
So this week, I have been trying to practice what I preach. But I’ve gone completely blank.
I had an experience of this kind of Clocking Time a few years ago. It challenged my beliefs about if, how, or when to express feelings. In a routine physical, an enthusiastic young Doctor decided that I had what looked like a life-threatening disease. Melanoma. She concluded that it had probably already metastasized. The biopsies to confirm this would take 48 hours.
A long couple of days, huh? I did not want to give myself over to the looming panic, but I also did not want to ignore the waves of feelings that were coming up, threatening to wash over me tsunami-style. What a balancing act that was! Luckily, I also knew to trust my gut, and the hard-earned knowledge I had of my own body.
My gut didn’t believe it, so I “waited” as that clock ticked fairly calmly. And it turned out to be, of all things, just an “age spot”!
During that eternity, on the clock just 48 hours, time had very little meaning. But a lot of other stuff sure did. Moral, ethical, philosophical debates raged in my head and heart.
Should I tell my family? Don’t they deserve to know?
Hell NO! There’s nothing to tell yet?
Yes but I always do scary things like this alone and never ask for support. Shouldn’t I reach out?
For what? You don’t know anything yet. Just wait!
Ya but I KNOW how PTSD works. The sooner someone who has been through a trauma can feel the resulting emotions, the better.
Yes but, has there actually been a trauma? You don’t know yet.
I think I was able to survive that two days of time standing still because of that little internal voice that was whispering to me that I was fine. When my gut reaction was confirmed, I could feel a huge relief and then use that to turn the whole thing into just an anecdote. Thank goodness, I also knew to get some “there, there” from my closest people. Turned out it was not a death sentence after all, but I still needed empathy for what was a rather a grueling stretch of stopped time!
I know why this current period of Clocking the Time has me in such a state. Fifty some years ago my mother went missing. I knew she was in serious emotional trouble. She had attempted suicide just two years before and this time, I recognized that same dark, dark resignation and resolve the last time I saw her. But because I was only a teenager, no one in authority would listen to me. For three eternal days, I looked for her, more and more frantically as each hour passed.
My gut was right. And I was too late. When they finally found her, she’d been dead for 3 days.
Right now, we are 7 days into hoping to hear from (or about) my teenage grandson, who “ran away” in a very dangerous state of mind.
My gut is failing me. Strangely and frustratingly silent.
And it’s been the longest week of my life….
Another kind of waiting….
Creepy, huh? I’ll show you Creepy!
Many will find my bugs Creepy but I have fallen in love. I know, quite hypocritical, given my distaste of their distance relative at the top, eh?
And I have been posting a lot lately about this Fungi Village growing right outside my bedroom window…Freaks me right out!!! I swear they are creeping closer and closer every day!
But today was the creepiest by far!
I’m starting to see faces on some of them!
I had the same thought as V.J. ( https://onewomansquest.org/2019/10/16/candid/ )
I immediately remembered this series of photos of cousins meeting for the first time.
No clue what they were watching but they both look pretty serious. And it was not the first time I caught a glimpse of my grandson’s protective nature!
I LOVE this word. Now to find some photos to represent such a fun topic!
First, the definitions of the word…
Does it mean warped, as in “unpleasant or unhealthily abnormal thinking”?
Like my best friend’s idea of ART?
Or twisted, like…
Or maybe twisted, as the following are some of my favorite photos?
Or maybe it’s just that other definition of twisted…
“forced out of its natural or proper shape; crumpled”
Anyway, I had fun in a twisted way…