Wow, tough theme.
I knew the exact photo immediately, but I keep this particular one hidden from myself, so I had to search through my files. It’s been almost four years and I still grieve a little every day.
They went from this…
And this is the last photo of them as a family…
PS In case it would be of support to anyone reading this, here is what we use in therapy to help folks walk thorough Endings, in the healthiest way possible. Handy to use for closure in any and all Endings, big or small…job, moving, school, relationships, pets, favorite restaurant closing, new phone, etc.
This is worth exploring and expressing in all its forms…denial, wishful thinking, false hopes, etc.
It takes some practice but being able to express a truly personalized resentment, without any finger pointing or blame toward another, is a valuable, life-long skill
It’s important to acknowledge the things you wish you could have done differently
Remembering the good times is the natural pathway to the 3 stages below. It is why we tell funny stories at funerals.
Release and Relief
There is always a whoosh of peace after wading through the painful parts of grieving an ending
Now true gratitude can happen, for the whole experience, even the hard lessons that usually come from an ending.
To be able to re-unite after an ending, even if just in your mind, without a bunch of leftover baggage, is really and truly possible.
These are the natural stages of all endings.
In order to have healthy beginnings, with no leftovers lingering to muddy the new waters, these phases must be experienced and honored…
not necessarily in this order, but finishing the first four
makes the last three much more accessible.
When I first started my blog, I warned readers I would be posting a lot of music and photos and humor (well, I think I’m funny at least), but would also occasionally have a heavier story to share.
Today’s post is an example of the latter.
A wonderful, provocative challenge was issued by Sreejit from The Seeker’s Dungeon.
He said “I am asking you to rip yourself open and put yourself back together again; explaining where you’ve been and where you are headed. In so doing, we hope to help others understand that they are not alone on this path.”
Then, encouraging us to dig deep, he wrote “Many times our darkest moments are what end up turning us towards a path of light. It is these soul shredding moments that I want us to share here. Let us in on one of the moments that took you from darkness to light.”
The following story is my response to his challenge. It’s long, and may be difficult for some readers. I would really appreciate comments, if you read it.
I am posting the link to his blog so you can read it there. That way, maybe you’ll glance through some of the other posts also. These have been some beautiful and powerful stories.
Great topic! But please forgive my irreverence. I am just now surfacing after writing a particularly heavy article for The Seeker’s Dungeon, and am looking for some LIGHT now!
So here goes…
We don’t get much Street Art around here so I am improvising today.
We have plenty of “Road Art”… mostly created by teenagers or the winter sunrise.
Then there is the ever popular Driveway Art…featuring the Paper Boy, the local ant population, and the contribution of our neighborhood fruit trees…
(I seem to see ART in a lot of driveways…)
Next we have Pot Hole Art…
And the hard to miss Road-Side Art…creators unknown.
Oh, and then there is Wall Art (not to be confused with Walmart)…
And I guess I should include Driving-on-the-Street Art…
Also, Deck Art (not to be confused with Art Deco)
But my favorite might have to be Art SEEN from the Street…
The Rock, on San Juan Island…
I suppose I could count this sentimental shot as Street Art, of interest only to my mush-head family…
Or maybe this depressing Street Art, warning us of still another upcoming McMansion being built on our tiny lane…
Or, I we can go to the local yearly Art Fair to see Sidewalk Art…which I have to admit was pretty spectacular…
But as for actual Street Art around here….not so much!
When it comes to Eyes…I only have three choices…all of which I have posted about before. But there you have it. These three sets of eyes figure very prominently in my life!
First, the most eye-connecting cat I’ve ever met, my sweet (recently passed) heart-cat, Zorro. We would commune deeply, through these long, meaningful stares….for 18 years.
I wrote Zorro’s Life Story for Katzenworld here: https://wordpress.com/post/chosenperspectives.com/18061
By no means, in second place, the eyes I have posted the most often are my grandson’s.
This boy surprised us all when he was born.
His mother has these beautiful, mischievous brown eyes.
His Father, gorgeous, penetrating yellow/hazel ones.
And no where in either of their lineages are any blue eyes…except little old ME, so obviously some ego mixed in with my love for his eyes!
Looking into these baby blues for any length of time can get you into serious trouble.
Now, just to make sure the record is straight…the eyes you just looked into above are, in my opinion, beautiful and impactful.
But below are my favorite eyes…the ones I get lost in…for so many years now, the eyes that carry me through every day of my life, the ones where I see the most love reflected right back at me…